Head Coach? Who, Me?
by Steve McGill

I’ve never been a head coach. I’ve been coaching since 1994, and I’ve never been in charge of a program. There was one year at my old school when I was co-head coach along with the distance coach, but he took on the majority of head coaching responsibilities. And then there was one summer, around 2012 or so, when I started up my own track club. But that was just one summer, and I had about eight kids on the squad, and they were all hurdlers except for one sprinter, so it wasn’t like we were a “track team” in the truest sense of the word. The reason I’ve never been a head coach is because I’ve never wanted to be. As an assistant, I was always able to just focus on the actual coaching on the track and helping the athletes to develop. I didn’t have to deal with the myriad responsibilities that a head coach has to deal with: scheduling meets, organizing practices, communicating with parents, running home meets, etc. As I used to always say, the head coach has to deal with all of the head aches. I’d rather just coach.

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Another reason I never envisioned myself as a head coach was because I don’t really care about team points the way a head coach needs to, and in the way that many head coaches are obsessed with. Head coaches are looking for points anywhere they can get them. If there’s a chance that an athlete can earn a point in the long jump even though he has never long-jumped before, let’s throw him in there and get that point. If a star athlete has a chance of scoring in four individual events at the state meet, let’s put her in all four. It’s all about the team. But for me, track and field has always been, first and foremost, an individual sport. When our team at my old school won the independent school state championship in 2005, I wasn’t nearly as happy as I had been in 2003, when we had swept 1-2-3 in both hurdling events. Everybody’s wired differently, and I just wasn’t wired to be a head coach, to oversee a whole program. 

But guess what y’all. I’m about to be a head coach this spring. Here’s the story of  how that came to be:

I first started teaching here, at Davidson Day School — a very small private school in Davidson, NC, back in January of 2015, when I replaced an English teacher who was leaving after the first semester to pursue a writing career. That spring, and the following spring, I assisted with the track team in the hurdles and sprints. Back then, we had a football team, and several of the football players came out for the team, so we had some talent. But the football players were arrogant and lazy and acted like they were doing everyone a favor by coming out for the team, so that was a pretty crappy experience. I did have one female hurdler who was pretty good, but then she got into theater and that was the end of that. I also had one of the football players run the hurdles and he did very well, and he and I formed a close bond. But after that second year, I was getting more and more requests for private hurdles training, and I was enjoying those sessions immensely, as I could really teach in a way that was fulfilling and gratifying. Plus, with our school team, we had maybe 15 kids on the team total, and we already had a sprint coach whose coaching philosophy clashed with mine. He was big on a lot of volume and didn’t put much emphasis on sprint mechanics, whereas I was kind of vice versa. So, the only athletes I was actually coaching were the one or two hurdlers. After the season ended I asked the Upper School Director if I needed to keep coaching in order to retain my teaching position, and he assured me that I didn’t because my contract stated that I was being paid as an English teacher and Head of the English Department. Okay bet, I’m out. At that point, heading into the 2017-18 school year, I was no longer coaching for a school or club at all, but was doing private coaching exclusively, which is how it has been ever since. 

Until now. After this past cross country season, the head coach, who also served as head coach came by my classroom one day and told me that he was planning to retire from coaching, although he would stay on as a teacher, and he wanted to know if I’d be interested in taking over the program. My first reaction, of course, was hell no, although I didn’t say that out loud. I told him I’d think about it and talk it over with the wifey and get back to him in a few days. I didn’t get back to him, but I was planning, once I did, to tell him I appreciate him thinking of me but I’m too busy with my private coaching and grading papers to take on the head coaching role. 

But then our new athletic director hopped on the case. In December, the mother of one of the kids I coach privately gifted me two tickets to see my Philadelphia 76ers play the Charlotte Hornets at the Spectrum Center in Charlotte. I had to find someone to go with. When I asked one of my colleagues, who is a sports fan, if he wanted to go, he said I should ask the new AD because “he’s a Philly guy just like you.” So I asked the new AD, whom I hadn’t met previously, and he eagerly agreed. We talked on the way to the game and shared childhood stories of watching the Sixers and the Eagles and discussing who our favorite players were growing up, etc. The fact that we’re the same age added an almost eerie sense of connection; it was like we just knew each other without ever having known each other till that day. About a week later, during exam time, he asked me to swing by his office to chat. I knew where this chat was going to go, because I had mentioned to him at the game about my background coaching track. Sure enough, he asked me if I’d be willing to be our new head coach. Again, I said I’d think about it over holiday break and get back to him. The difference was, this time, I really did think about it.

Over the two-week holiday break, I weighed the pros and cons. I’d receive a stipend, and with COVID and unpredictable weather and the start of the start of the indoor season and locked gates at local tracks making my private coaching routine less and less reliable, I could certainly use the money. Then there was the fact that our team is a small team, with maybe 15 kids, so there’d be no pressure nor even expectations to be in the running for a state championship. The small numbers would also mean less athletes to manage, less egos to manage, and less planning time spent organizing practice sessions. The downside included the fact that I would be going into it not knowing what I’m doing, and I’d have to learn on the go. Since our school has no track, all meets would be away meets, meaning missing class time to get out of school early and driving the dang mini-bus down the highway. And then there was simply the fact that I was comfortable with my life as it was. Why add more to my plate when my plate was already full?

But ever since I can remember, even when I was a little boy, I’ve always had this thing where I hate letting people down. When people are counting on me, I want to come through for them. When I let people down, I just get so down on myself. Once, when I was about 14 or 15 years old, I was playing a basketball game for my summer league team, and I made a big steal late in the game. I sprinted down the court for an easy layup that would give us the lead and most likely the win. But I missed the wide-open layup and we lost. I was crying in the locker room afterwards. It wasn’t even a big game, just a regular season game, and none of my teammates nor coaches were upset with me. They all tried to console me, telling me that I had played hard and played well and that I shouldn’t be beating myself up over one missed shot. But I took it hard. I felt like I had let all of them down. And I can honestly say that part of the reason, even if it was subconscious, that I liked track more than basketball was because if I made a mistake in a hurdle race, I only let myself down, whereas if I made a mistake in a basketball game, I let the whole team down. 

That’s weird, I know. But everybody’s weird in their own way, so I roll with it. The final deciding factor in accepting the head coaching position is that I didn’t want to let down the athletic director, nor the previous head coach, both of whom believed in me and expressed extreme confidence that the program would be in good hands if I were to take on the position. Most significantly, I didn’t want to let down the kids on the team. As unqualified as I felt myself to be, I couldn’t think of anyone else in the school building who was more qualified. I teach or have taught almost all of the kids on the team, and I knew they would be exuberant if I were to coach them. So it wasn’t a matter of having a lot of talent to coach; I know there aren’t not a lot of talented athletes at our school, so I had (and have) no illusions that we could shake up the world. But growth is growth, and fun is fun. If I can help them to grow, and if I can make it an enjoyable experience, why not go for it?

So I accepted the position. I held my first interest meeting last week, and ten kids showed up. Probably another four or five who didn’t attend will come out for the team. We’re such a small school that I’ll have to be okay with some of the kids being part-time in track while they also play another sport or play a club sport. Yesterday I held an informal practice on the soccer field at school. About six kids showed up and I taught them basic sprint mechanics, and they’ll have a long way to go before they master any of it. But one kid, the only senior, who ran 1:59 and 52.0 in the 800 and 400 last year, said he’d be willing to try the 300m hurdles. Yesterday, on day one of him ever going over a hurdle, he was able to lead with either leg (without my prompting) over 30-inch hurdles. So he’s gonna be my project. I’m gonna see if I can get him to compete for a state championship in the 300 hurdles. He’s got the speed and the speed-endurance, so I just need to teach him how to hurdle and how to develop a rhythm between the hurdles. Should be fun.

The life lesson I learn from all of this is to always stay open to possibilities. I don’t know what lies ahead in my new role as head coach. But I enter into it with no expectations, willing to learn and grow, willing to allow every moment to teach me something new.

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