Dealing With A “Loss” When You Run A “Disappointing” Race
by Teige West
Usain Bolt was not always The Fastest Man in the World; consider his performance at the Athens Olympics in 2004. Yes, he was only 17 and he was suffering from an injury, but he finished 5th in the 200m heats. During the 2017 Rio Olympics, Allyson Felix, the most decorated U.S. female runner, lost the 400m, leaving with a silver medal. In one game during the 2017 NBA playoffs, LeBron James only scored 11 points; he was averaging 43 points per game in that series. Even Michael Jordan, The Greatest of All-Time, one of the only NBA players to score over 60 points in a game (actually, he scored over 60 points in five games), had several less-than-10 point games. These four athletes are some of the best athletes in their respective sports who are alive today. We expect them to be invincible. We expect that when they step up to compete, the “W” is already marked in the column. But, sometimes the win isn’t there for whatever reason — injury, a loss of mental focus, a personal issue, or fatigue. Sometimes a race or game doesn’t have our desired fairy tale ending.
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Whatever level of hurdling you’ve achieved, losses happen, though they seem to be a bit easier to swallow at the beginning of your career. When you’ve dedicated years of your life, you want to win because that seems reasonable—you put in blood, sweat and tears and then you’re supposed achieve your goal, right? Often, yes, but sometimes, no. So how do you deal with that loss? You must do three things: process your emotions, make a genuine analysis and then make adjustments while looking ahead.
Processing Emotions: The 24-Hour Rule
You may have heard of the 24-Hour Rule. Many coaches, teachers, even corporate managers implement this rule to curb knee-jerk emotional confrontations. The rule goes like this: whenever there is a situation that creates an intense emotional reaction, wait 24 hours before tangibly addressing the situation. This rule is pretty old; years ago people would have said “sleep on it.” Things usually look at least a little better in the morning.
When performance in a race is disappointing, whether ”disappointing” means coming in last, not qualifying for the final race, or coming in second when you expected the gold medal, the first few hours will be the most emotional. Pushing your anger, sadness and frustration away will not help. Disregard anyone who tells you to “get over it” or “don’t worry about it,” if you are worrying about it (there may be times when you’re not obsessively preoccupied with the end result, and that’s ok; i.e. when you are coming back from injury, or you’ve had a major life event happen, the simple act of hurdling again may be your focus). Those around you probably won’t know what to say, and honestly, there really isn’t anything that will help in those first few hours. For the first 24 hours, get mad. Cry. Whatever you have to do that isn’t destructive or personally harmful, do it. Sports are emotional, otherwise winning wouldn’t feel so good, and a disappointment wouldn’t hurt. Many professional teams have the 24 hour rule—one day to celebrate a victory or mourn a loss. If you need to take that time off from training, schoolwork, or whatever you can sacrifice, do it. Stepping back and taking time for yourself to refocus can help you discharge your emotions and begin to think rationally about what happened.
While you are processing your emotions during that first day and thereafter, be cautious when using “I am” statements negatively. What that means is this: avoid “I am a bad runner,” “I’m the worst hurdler out here,” “I am so stupid for clipping that hurdle,” “I am not good at this sport.” The inner dialogue you have with yourself is so, so important, and not just after a loss, but every day. Some people are more prone to negative self-talk and it can become a habit. Pay attention to your thoughts, and when you catch these statements running through your head, stop. Replace them with “I did” statements that focus on actions. For example, “I didn’t get enough sleep last night and I wasn’t focused,” or “I didn’t use correct form and clipped the hurdle.” Whatever the reason for your disappointing race, there is some action that was the contributing factor. Do you honestly believe that when Usain Bolt came in 5th in those heats, that it was because he’s a bad sprinter or a disappointment? No. Probably only he and his trainer can pinpoint the specific issues, but something happened. Which brings us to the second stage of handling a disappointment: what did happen?
Analyze the Problems
A disappointing performance can become one of two things: it can be a ghost that haunts your future performance, or it can become a teachable moment. If you don’t put in an honest, searching analysis of what went wrong, you risk allowing the disappointment to morph into something bigger than it is. After your first 24 hours, set aside your emotions and determine what could have changed to bring home that win. Be honest. If you had a slow start and you’ve been working on starts and you thought you had it, you don’t have it yet. Fess up. Your coach will probably know that anyway, so there’s no use in hiding. Besides, wouldn’t it be better to put in a little more time to fix the problem? There are a myriad of explanations for an unsatisfactory performance—injury or pain, fatigue, dehydration, personal issues, the track was slick from a storm, you were too nervous, you weren’t focused, the list goes on. After you put in a thoughtful, rational analysis, meet with your coach and talk. He or she may agree with you and may have other suggestions. And, look, if it’s one bad race, take it in stride. We are not always on our game 100% of the time. If you have repeated disappointments, there is something tangible that can be modified. Get someone to make videos of your competitions. It’s hard to watch ourselves on a screen, but video is a great tool to replay the race until you see specific problems that need to be addressed.
Once you determine what needs to be addressed, address it. Every day. There are basketball players who will shoot 300 times from the place where they missed what could have been the game winning shot every day for weeks after a lost game. When you hear interviews of athletes who make that game-winning effort, you will often hear them say “I practiced that every day this summer after team practice.” The work paid off. If your form isn’t quite right, work on it with your coach. When coach isn’t around, use a video phone to film yourself and check it. If you look great at the starting line and fade hard toward the end of the race, work on endurance with proper nutrition, strength training and drills. And work on it every day until your competition performance reflects your effort.
The last part of analyzing your “bad” race is to name three things that you did well. This time you didn’t clip one hurdle, and often you do. You usually have a fear of tripping and this time you didn’t think about that. Your strides approaching the hurdle were appropriately paced this time. Whatever you did well, give yourself accolades for those things. There’s nothing that boosts confidence like working hard at something and seeing the dividends finally arrive. Look how far you’ve come from even a month ago. You’ve improved in some ways, so recognize what you have accomplished.
The Future
Now that you’ve dealt with your emotions and you’ve determined what happened, look towards the future. Think about why you chose hurdling. Why have you dedicated so much of your life to this sport? Because you love it? Because it’s not easy? Because you love how it feels to fly over a hurdle? It’s not just about winning, is it? Sure, a win is great. It is the ultimate goal, but winning is certainly not the only goal. The process should be your focus, the process of getting stronger, faster, better than you were. As you progress, look to how much better you are going to be in a month, 6 months, a year. That’s the real goal—to improve. And isn’t that the focus of everything in life—to take what seems improbable and make it possible?
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